Hotel-Pension Funk in Berlin

I arrived at 8pm to find no one at reception—no staff, no welcome, just silence. The air was thick with the smell of mold and mildew, especially in the bathroom, where the shower had visible grime and black mold in the corners. The “room” had one limp pillow and a mattress that seemed unchanged since the 1930s. I couldn’t open the windows because of mosquitos, so there was no ventilation. The air felt attic-stale and dusty, and I started coughing almost immediately. The carpet was dirty and covered with pet hair. To make matters worse, the shared bathroom was separated from my room by a paper-thin wall. You could hear everything. When I emailed the hotel about the strong mold odor and how I couldn’t breathe, no one responded. I felt completely abandoned—and frankly unsafe. Some may call it “historic,” but this was more Suspiria than charming. Sure, the lighting might work for a horror shoot, but we all know what happens to the girl who spends the night. I left—dragging four suitcases down three flights of stairs with no working elevator—at 11pm. Thankfully, the Hoxton (one block away) had a room. Still, even though I stayed less than an hour and became physically ill, the hotel charged me for five full nights. I’m currently disputing the charges with my credit card company and documenting the health risks. If you have any sensitivity to mold, dust, or basic human dignity, avoid this place at all costs.