The Lumiares Hotel & Spa in Lisbon

Singers and players still good. Was here 5 years ago, but like a lot of Lisbon has sold its soul to the tourist devil. Full of tour groups who don't respect he protocols of silence and ban on flash photos. Service average, and floor management rude. Look elsewhere for fado authenticity now.

Good fado music, but the food was much too expensive for the quality provided. The stuff seemed clumsy although they tried to look professional in the beginning. I wouldn’t go there again for an authentic fado experience.

This place values money over customer satisfaction. Good fado music, but a lot of breaks in between songs. Very expensive food (€30+) per item and to watch and drink there is a expected minimum spend per person of €17. Cocktails were very bad for the price (€15/€17). At some point I accepted the pricing and wanted to order another drink but I was not helped. The waiters seemed only to serve big tables that had multiple courses. People next to us left because they couldn't even order a dessert.

Wanted to pop in to experience Fado, but was told on the door we wouldn't be allowed in unless we ordered food. Unperturbed, we agreed and went in and were told we had 10 minutes to order, because it was almost 9pm and the musicians were coming back on. Almost immediately the lights were dimmed and everyone stopped talking. The musicians started playing, and I somehow managed to quietly get the attention of our waitress, and I ordered a bottle of wine and our food. We asked for no tomatoes on one of the dishes and were told this would be fine.

The wine arrived about 15 minutes later, and our food was not far behind. The lobster and scallop rice dish was far too hot in temperature and felt microwaved. The pasta dish was totally different to what was ordered and we were told this was because we asked for no tomato. Though it would have been nice to be told this upfront as they neglected to give us the pastry, which was the main element of the dish, leaving the meal a disappointment.

The music was very nice and probably a lovely thing to do in the right venue. The waiter and waitress were fairly sour and not very friendly at all.

When the bill arrived we realised we had been charged for bread (which had clearly been left out a while as it was stale) and water (that the waiters were also using for the table next to us) that we didn't even order. When I asked about this the waiter looked at me blankly, as though this was to be expected.

We did expect the food to cost a bit more than other places due to the live Fado, though the food was mediocre at best.

I can't truly convey how bad this place was.